Apologizing

Why is it apologizing makes me feel angry?

Supposedly when I apologize I should feel release and a weight off my back.

Instead, I'm feeling annoyed.

I screwed up. I acknowledge that. Which is what led to the apology in the first place.  DH asked specifically for some help and I completely ignored the request, justifying my decision by the fact that I was right and of course DH would make the same choice if he had all the facts, which I did, never, of course, bothering to actually have a conversation with him and ask him if I could alter the schedule or if he would change his mind.

So I apologized.

But as I was apologizing, DH would say things like, "This isn't the first time you've done this," and "If I had done this, you would be pissed."

He's right.

I completely acknowledge that.

But it doesn't irk me any less.

Grrrr....